What does it mean to be ‘bad at goodbyes’? I mean, that could go so many ways. Some people might cry whenever they say goodbye, or some get depressed, or some get really clingy. But I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who does what I do. At least, I’ve never discussed it with anyone I know.
I rarely get distressed when it comes to saying goodbye. I’ve always thought of it as a temporary thing, so why get upset? I know when I say goodbye, I’m going to be able to say hello again at some point in the future. Call me an optimist or a religious zealot, but it’s just how I think about it. For example, when I first left for Pennsylvania, the only person I cried over was Teresa. When I left Etown to come home, the only person I cried over was Stepf. I didn’t even cry when I said goodbye to the girl I’d been living with the entire year—the girl I’d immediately become attached to and called family.
Does this make me bad at goodbyes?
I don’t think so. I think I have much better things to waste my tears on and more than one reason to be happy. Why cry over a temporary absence?
You’re probably wondering where this is coming from. No, I didn’t just randomly sit down and start thinking about this today. It was a couple days ago that I really looked at this issue with any real concern. But I felt like I needed to write it all down because now I’m dealing with more than just a temporary goodbye.
My great Uncle Larry died last night. To be honest, I don’t know if I’ll ever see him again. It’s not like I was really close with him, but he did add so much laughter and happiness to family gatherings that I can’t help but be…bothered by this. But I didn’t cry. It didn’t even really hit me until just now. He’s gone. And I still can’t cry. I’m not terribly sad. I’m still able to laugh about the characters I’m reading about, and I’m still feeling normal and relaxed.
Maybe I really just started thinking about this when my mom asked me what was wrong with me.
Is there something wrong with me? Am I the real definition of ‘bad at goodbyes’?
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